personal training

So I had my assessment yesterday. It actually went pretty well and I only cried like 6 times. I kept apologizing and saying I knew it wasn't a counseling appointment. I never cried to the point of not being able to talk, only to where she could barely understand me. I call that a win.

We basically just talked about why I was there, my goals and my nutrition and exercise habits. I felt pretty comfortable there, which I was fairly nervous about. We talked for almost an hour, then did some fitness assessment basics so she could figure out which of their levels I would be on.

I had to step up and down on a block for 3 minutes to check my heart rate after. Ok, I'm 5'2". That's short. The block was probably 12-15 inches high, which is really high for a short person. And I am soooo sore today! My heart rate was 120 when I was finished and she said she likes to see it in the 90's. I asked what that meant and her response was "You're out of shape." Well no shit!

Seriously though, I used to swim 3 times a week and I could tell a huge difference in my energy and general fitness level. But I haven't been to the gym since the end of October, so I'm basically starting over again. Realistically, it's impossible to lose all the weight I need to before my next IUI. But I can't wait until I'm skinny to have a baby. It will never happen. I'm just trying to make the most of this time that I unfortunately have and go into the next pregnancy in the best shape possible. I also know it will help me feel better.

They do packages of either 1 on 1 hour sessions small groups training with 3-4 people that they call Pack Training. I decided to go with a combo package of 1 individual and 2 pack trainings per week. We honestly couldn't do any more than that financially. I'm already stressed about this enough. Max is being so great and helped me decide what we realistically could afford and where we could make sacrifices. I so appreciate his optimism and support in this endeavor, but to be honest I'm the one that does the budget every week and I'm stressed about money. It feels so selfish to spend this much money on myself when soon, hopefully, we will have many different things to spend money on. But I know this isn't just for me. I just have to keep telling myself that.

I'm considering doing some weekly weigh-ins or other sorts of updates on here. I'm so hesitant to reveal my weight though. I don't know why I feel fine talking about my intimate lady business but not weight. Oh, the power of self image.

My first appointment is tomorrow after work. I'm excited, but know I will be in pain after. Should be fun!