As I mentioned, I've been out of town for the last week for a work conference. It was tons of fun, a lot of work, and exhausting. I got to see some really great friends that I don't get to see that often. But like I said, it was exhausting.
So I did Femera this cycle and began using Progesterone tablets. I knew my next cycle should have started on Monday. I expected it to happen all day Monday, but nothing. I began to get a little hope in my head, which for me basically begins freaking me out and making me act like an emotional fool. So, I got in my head that I had to get a pregnancy test right then. I was supposed to be meeting friends to head out to Bourbon Street to see the Halloween festivities. Yes, Bourbon Street. So, I go to Walgreens, 1 block from Bourbon. Do you know how awkward it is to buy a HPT smack in the middle of the crazy partiers? Madness.
Well, I run back to the hotel and realize I meant to get a digital test, but didn't. I hate the non-digital tests. They completely freak me out. I can't tell if there is a line there or not. I literally see a line one minutes, and the next I don't. I took both tests in the box, both of which I couldn't really tell the results. So then I was even more freaked out/hopeful. There was a CVS on another corner, so I ran out of the hotel down to the CVS (walking by myself in Nola on Halloween night). I'm in CVS, and I can't find the HPTs anywhere! I walk around CVS forever, no one is available to help me because the line at the counter is ages long. By this time I'm 20 minutes late to meet up with friends, so I begin walking back down Canal Street crying on the phone with Max. So I go out to Bourbon Street, in a horrible mood, and basically sit in the corner depressed all night.
I wake up Tuesday morning sure that I will start. I go all day long and nothing. Again, it's dinner time and I'm desperate to take a test. I tell my friends to go on and I will meet them at the restaurant. Thankfully, one of my greatest friends that I get to see twice a year follows after me because she knows a tiny bit about the infertility issues and could tell that I was not doing well. She ends up walking with me back to Walgreens to get the test, then to the restaurant where I proceed to pee on the stick in the restaurant bathroom. The digital test is of course negative which really only confirmed what I thought. Hope is one thing, but I truly knew I wasn't. I went ahead and took one the next morning too, just in case, but no. And I started later in the day.
Oh well. I'm now looking forward to moving forward this cycle with IUI. This week was very emotionally draining, especially not being with Max. I'm thankful for my friend who knew me well enough to know to follow me.
I went for my baselines today and everything looks good. I will start Femera on Monday. We'll see.